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It seems forever now as I look back through time and in the misty distance watch myself as a child. Those old tapes are sometimes valuable. I recall sitting on a swing, one of the pure joys of my young life! Happily swaying back and forth, the breeze caressing my cheeks as i pumped constantly to reach the highest heights, fearlessly reaching my goal, until I could see over the top bar. Gradually I would slow down and begin again. I would literally spend hours on a swing, it was pure contentment and peace for me. The time would come when I had to leave and it was necessary to jump! I’d witnessed others jump from incredible heights to land on the ground. Some did the duck and roll, others flat out flew through the air and landed in a heap on the ground. It was my turn. I needed to be brave and I waited nervously for the right time to leap. I did it! I was thrilled.
As adults, that leap of faith, that jump into the unknown seems far scarier and far more difficult to accomplish. Fears pop up and the what if scenario. That new job in a town far away, taking our relationship to a new level, making new friends, obtaining our first home, our first child, all require that jump into uncertainty. Often we have to feel the fear and do it anyway!
When you are secure in who you are and what you are about, where you want to go and what you are determined to accomplish, that leap of faith, that jump into “mystery” becomes doable and certainly worthwhile! More than worthwhile for we gain confidence and believe in ourselves and our ability to handle anything that comes our way.
Having a fabulous family and friends who act as our support group can make decisions so much easier. And each time I think of that frightened nervous child attempting fate jumping from that swing into the vastness below, I cheer her. I congratulate her with humble pride. I want to be that child again, with determination, courage, and strength. She’s my constant reminder that anything is possible when you have faith in yourself and your abilities.
There’s a word! It encompasses so much! First thought to come to mind is the cravings of pregnancy which inevitably makes me smile, pickles and ice cream, to a variety of other foods.
However, we can crave great literature, art, music. Cravings of the soul. A feeling we will wither and die if we don’t receive a modicum of what we could describe as want need desire.
Whether what we crave is healthy or not, it has power. Clawing, determined unsettling power. If you’ve ever been in a position that you can’t determine what it is, and you try to fill that hole, that void with something, anything, thinking that it might mitigate that undefined hunger you soon realize the folly of your decision because the unanswered craving continues.